Robert the Doll begins with the standard horror movie claim that the events to follow are based on a true story. It then moves on to a scene where a family is acting all spooked about some sort of evil doll. This is all just preamble, however. The film is actually about Jenny (Suzie Frances Garton), a woman with a history of mental problems trying to make it work out with her family. She has just fired her housekeeper, whose advanced age was keeping her from doing her work effectively. But before the housekeeper leaves, she leaves a vintage doll with Emma's son Gene (Flynn Allen). The doll is evil, of course, and begins wreaking havoc around the house.
Here's how most of the movie plays out. Gene claims that the doll talks to him. The parents write this off as just something kids do. When something bad happens in the house, like a painting being ruined or the word "die" showing up written in lipstick on a mirror, Jenny blames her young son Gene. Gene, on his part, says that it was Robert that did it. Jenny doesn't believe him and gets angry. The movie then moves on to the next weird thing that happens. The process repeats itself until the last fifteen minutes of the film, where the fact that Robert is alive becomes undeniable.
Through all of it, the movie never gets around to being scary. It seems entirely reliant on the appearance of the titular doll to elicit any sort of unease in the viewer. Because there is nothing remotely spooky about what takes place in the picture. Most of what's supposed to be disturbingly in this picture takes place off screen. The film seems to be operating as if Robert's status was ambiguous. It shows the effect of whatever it is that Robert is doing, and generally misses out on the possibility of creating unnerving images through the simple visual of this ugly piece of production design doing stuff.
The film seems generally averse to animating its central threat. When we finally see it moving, we mainly get to see its feet taking awkward, weightless steps. This is likely a consequence of the film's limited resources, but it's also an indication of a general lack of ingenuity. Films throughout history have managed to make really benign looking things appear somewhat threatening. This movie just doesn't try hard enough. It doesn’t do enough to make the doll seem like something to be feared. The production as a whole feels basic, the camera never doing much more than rolling idly.
Not helping matters are the terrible performances. It is amateurish to say the least. Suzie Frances Garton turns out the histrionics from moment one, and doesn't display an ability to connect with anyone in a scene with her. The young Flynn Allen sounds bored throughout the whole thing. The film kind of hinges on his ability to sell his enthusiasm for this doll, and it never quite gets there. To be fair to the actors, the material just isn't there for them. But this really is what people think of when made to imagine bad b-movie acting.
What's really annoying about Robert the Doll is the claim that it's based on a true story. We really need to monitor the claims that these movies make. It is downright ridiculous that a movie about a doll that moves around and murders people should be able to claim some connection to real life events. Putting that aside, the movie is just plain terrible. It is an amateurish production that doesn't really deserve to be projected in major cinemas.
My Rating:
